Adam and Joe…song wars greatest hits!
In honour of the fact that a complete stranger has given me tickets to see Adam and Joe tomorrow as part of the Electric Proms, I thought I would do a post dedicated to their show (thanks again Alanna and hooray for Black Squadron!).
Firstly if you don’t listen to their show on 6 music on Saturdays – you should! You can listen again all week, or listen to the podcast.
They have an amazing occasional feature called ’song wars’ where they each have to make up a song according to a theme. Not only are the songs brill – the podcast and show jingles are really funny and you will find yourself singing along to them as well.
So without further ado – here are my faves. They are skewed in favour of Joe but I have a restricted selection on Youtube. Thanks to the fans who have put the songs to videos!
This first song is for my two commenters – thanks for keeping the blog alive! I know you love the Apprentice and this is a song about Margaret (her hair is like a cloud, her lips so red and her eyes strong and proud)
The Antiques Roadshow theme by Joe – bringing the TV theme we all know and love bang up to date with a street vibe as only Joe can do!!
The Sontom of Qualace by Joe – a song for the James Bond film that is miles better than the Jack White and Alicia Keys theme
More videos after the jump!
Confused by The Happening trailer…but don’t want to see another M Night Shyamalan film?
In my infrequent series where I see films so you don’t have to – here is a quick summary of ‘The Happening’. You may have seen the trailer and wondered hmm why are all those people falling of buildings, what is going on – in fact what is Happening?
Well Marky Mark is a teacher worried about bumble bees dying out, Zooey Deschanel is the love interest. Basically, the plants have got sick of humans and have started releasing some sort of chemical that overrides our natural instinct not to commit suicide (!?). So humans start killing themselves with whatever implement is nearest or throw themselves off buildings or onto sharp objects or through plate glass windows etc. Then the plants stop releasing the chemical for no reason. Then the film ends with the same thing starting in Paris.
That’s it.
P.s I defended The Village but can’t say anything more to support Shyalaman after Lady in the Water.
Ask Forgive you Forget you…Why do Heidi and Lauren hate each other?
I received the best text ever from a friend yesterday: “Do you watch the Hills? Why don’t Lauren and Heidi like each other anymore?”
As I texted back my reply, this gave me the inspiration for a new blog feature - send me your TV related questions and I will provide all the background you need to catch up!
So, why don’t Heidi and Lauren like each other? The rift is a bit unexplained when season 3 starts with Lauren alluding to a ‘rumour’. Basically, Heidi starts going out with Spencer in season 2 and it is obvious he is a bit of a knob. He tries to come onto Audrina, has a party with some Playboy playmates and Lauren obviously does not warm to him (as would any sane person who is not plastic Heidi).
However, this all comes to a climax in the hiatus between season 2 and 3, when Spencer spreads a rumour that Lauren and her ex Jason has a sex tape. Among other people, he informs Perez Hilton who obviously puts this on his website along with the fact that Lauren has the nickname Beef Curtains! Lauren is a classy lady and doesn’t ever directly refer to all this when filming starts again for season 3. But she blames Heidi for knowing and denying to her face that Spencer had anything to do with it.
It is actually from an argument on this subject that this blog takes its name. Heidi asks Lauren if they can move on from this rift and Lauren replies all that is left to do” is to forgive and forget, I want to forgive you then forget you!” Brilliant!
By the end of Season 5, Spencer does admit that he spread the rumour so that Lauren will attend his and Heidi’s wedding! Thankfully Lauren carries on hating Spencer and his flesh-coloured beard. Also, watch for the plastic surgery Heidi has on nose/boobs as the series goes on, she used to be very naturally pretty in the earlier seasons.
That’s a brief summary. Send me your other questions and I will do my best to enlighten you!
A bit of old school Whitney…
As the non-cracked out version of Whitney Houston gets ready to appear on X Factor next week, I think this is a great time to relive her best moment ever or hopefully introduce it to a new audience. Here is Whitney Houston shouting Kiss My Ass, as only she can, on the reality show Being Bobby Brown. Oh yeah, and Kandy Rain are out – big surprise!
Just when I thought I was out… X Factor pulls back me in
In celebration of the final 12 and the studio finals tonight, why don’t you wear some of the failed contestants’ outfits as a tribute or even for Halloween.
The How Hood are you? T shirt from Harmony Hood 
Pretty self-explanatory – a classic investment piece, also comes in lime green (of course!), yellow and blue.
Be a cheerleader/singer in the love meow minidress, they were so bad I don’t even remember the name of the group. This dress just screams class and look it’s on sale!
Or if you want to celebrate the pointlessness of Sinitta, and are not attention seeking enough to wear her leaf bikini – simply be a pineapple head with her trademark gold lame scrunchie. A great stocking-filler pressie too!
So enough with the shopping and on with a quick show recap. The final stage before the live finals is getting rid of 12 of the 24 at the judges’ houses, which is always a lie because it is only Simon who owns his house in LA anyway. Louis does own his house in Dublin obviously, but this year they decided they needed to go further afield so he went to a random house in Lake Como. This makes it all the more annoying when the contestants say that flying out to various exotic locations makes them realize what they can achieve and what they could have in a few years. If Cheryl and Will don’t own their own glamorous places then these jokers have no chance! Didn’t Alexandra Burke live at home until she got forced out by bullies last week…
One of of the under-25s in Morocco said “If you’d asked me a few weeks ago, I would never have imagined I could be in Morocco”. I am sorry, but this is just lack of imagination and/or education more than anything else, we can all fly to Marrakesh with Ryanair, it’s not hard.
This series is right on cue with starting the fake drama, in this case the decision-making for the over-25s shows us the level of fake arguments we can expect over the coming weeks. When they were sorting through the photos, Sinitta said “this man’s a star” and Simon replied, in his special serious tone, “no Sinitta, he is a risk”. Simon’s self-importance has now grown to regarding X Factor as being crucial to national security. Actually Simon, he is not a risk to anything apart from your wallet, badum-ching!
A good episode, with everyone’s hopes and dreams summed up by Stacey Solomon “I could go from nothink to somethink”.
Check out the final 12 here and I will recap the first live final this week at some point.
Why I love…Jack Black and Will Ferrell (and John C. Reilly?)
With all the recent Oscars coverage, I thought I would go old school and post this video of Jack Black and Will Ferrell from the Oscars two years ago. It is a really funny song about how comedians never get nominated for oscars and then John C Reilly jumps out of the audience too. Love it! Also, Will Ferrell looks like an absolute giant next to Jack Black. I can’t embed the video so please watch here!
Do you feel alone in loving Lost? How to convince people there is a plot!
I am getting pretty evangelical about this series of Lost and really feel that it is coming together, I am boring everyone by telling them it is brilliant! For everyone who has stuck with it from the beginning, the viewers are really getting rewarded and it is so exciting. It is even better if you also peruse some of the best blogs out there to get up on the theories, and little insider jokes or significant events that you would otherwise miss.
If you are watching in the UK on Sky One on Sundays at 9pm, we are only a few days behind but avoid looking at anything online from Thursday to Sunday or you will see spoilers. But you can read all the recaps and theories straight after the episode, which is great!
I love Totally Lost - watch it the day that Lost is shown. It is a really funny web series, quite The Soup-like but also recaps the most recent episode and discusses theories and things you may have missed. It provides key teasers for that night’s episode! Doc Jensen also does great recaps, which looks at the most significant events of the episode and makes links to things you have no idea about!
Ack’s photo recaps are hilarious. They won’t take you through the theories but are very funny.
If you missed an episode and want a full recap of everything that happened go to Grey Bishop.
For all the info you need on Lost – check out the Lostpedia. The name is pretty self-explanatory!
And after the jump – a quick guide to how to argue with people who are hating on Lost!
The dad from My So-called Life is the new Jim from Neighbours (alan dale)!
I have only just recently started re-watching My So-called Life and am loving the teen angst and the amount of nineties plaid/tartan. It was good timing because two weeks later the dad (Tom Irwin) turns up on both Lost and 24 in the same week (UK television timings)! He plays a noble chemical plant manager in 24 and Ben’s lawyer in Lost. He must have changed agents recently or something. It is a small step from this to reaching the heady heights of Alan Dale, who managed The O.C and Ugly Betty as well as 24 and Lost after we all knew and loved him as Jim from Neighbours.
Why I love…Will Ferrell
Old Prospector Sketch – I don’t know why this never made it onto SNL, it was cut from the live show probably because they were all laughing so much. It is one of the funniest skits ever. Watch Jimmy Fallon, Tracy Morgan, Horatio Sanz and Chris Kattan fail to keep it together as Will Ferrell plays Gus Chiggins, an old prospector attached to an army unit for no apparent reason.
more about “Why I love…Will Ferrell“, posted with vodpod
The Landlord – This is such a funny idea and it is all about Will’s delivery!
more about “The Landlord from Will Ferrell and Ad…“, posted with vodpod
Also the current Haribo advert is blatantly based on this interrogation follow-up to The Landlord. Am I right or am I right?
Living on the Edge vs Laguna Beach: Cheshire or California – you decide…
Hilariously, MTV UK bills Living on the Edge as LA lifestyle, Cheshire postcode. It is meant to be the UK’s answer to Laguna Beach but to be honest is embarrassing. Instead of DRAMA in the real OC, we get a series about which universities everyone is going to, complaints about long-distance relationships while at boarding school (yes really!) and watching long-term teenage couples celebrate their anniversaries.
The producers obviously tried to stick to the core plot elements of Laguna, but failed hideously in the following ways:
The casting
Problem number one was choosing the most boring set of teenagers ever, they have all been in long-term relationships since the age of about 5, so there is zero intrigue. The producers were obviously hoping for a love triangle in the vein of LC, Stephen and Kristin, but instead we have to put up with everyone claiming that Stephen Beard is a dangerous womanizer who can’t be trusted, when we have literally seen him pull about 2 people.
The big summer holiday
Everyone from Laguna goes to Cabo San Lucas in Mexico (woo – Spring Break!), cue lots of brilliant drunken DRAMA. Where do the kids go from Living on the Edge? Wakestock!! Has anyone ever heard of this? I have actually just looked it up and it is apparently Europe’s largest wakeboarding festival. How lame is that for a group holiday! All they really did was sit on a grey beach and it was as boring to watch as it sounds.
Fake jobs
Millie and Sasha were really excited to land a one-week internship at Glamour magazine in London. It is pretty shameful that the producers could only swing a week, when Lauren and Whitney lived in the Teen Vogue broom cupboard for about three years during The Hills.
Finally, what are the ‘cast’ going to move on to? Stephen is basically told by his acting teacher that he is awful but manages to land a job in Hollyoaks two weeks later!! Again, the mighty power of the MTV cameras gets underqualified people jobs/exposure they aren’t qualified for (also see Josh at Models 1 and Xfm). At least in Laguna Beach, people like Stephen and Kristin do their ‘acting’ work off camera, and there is some pretence that they are trying to live normal teenage lives.
I highly doubt that this show will be recommissioned for a third series. There are rumours that there will be a version of The Hills or The City set in London and we can only hope that it will be just as laughable!
